I came across this post from a doctoral student in systematic theology at the University of Notre Dame, Justin Bartkus. I am sharing today a critical thing to remember of challenges we can face in passing on the faith. “Several years ago, I found myself at a coffee shop, seated across from a proud and energetic father of three young kids. I was interviewing him as part of a research study on how parents view the importance of religion in raising their children. I asked him, one of the stauncher Catholics we interviewed, whether it would bother him if his children eventually did not remain Catholic. His response was firm and passionate: ‘I would hope they do, yes, but my children are not outcomes.’ In their zeal to assert their correctness in the ‘whats’ of religion, namely the ritual observances and adherence to formulae, the Pharisees are forgetful of the how required of them by God’s grace: to act always in tenderness, vulnerability, and gentleness. And so it is for us. Absent these virtues of grace, we will inevitably immolate people into an ash heap of outcomes, locking doors before them and making them subservient to our expectations rather than to God’s wise and timely providence. It is much more challenging to be humble than correct, infinitely more sanctifying to preach the truth in patience than condemn in wrath. Even if the ‘whats’ of religion is necessary for holiness, its entire work lies in the “how” of the catechetical method.